Monday, May 08, 2006


I don't want to "work" today. I have to but that's beside the point.

I do want to write!

Writing isn't "work" at the moment. It's pure pleasure and I'm thoroughly enjoying myself doing it.

So why are work and play so hard to do at the same time?

If I were a professional writer - I'd probably find the writing process tedious and horrible. I wouldn't want to do it and would find every excuse not to.

I'd give anything to go work in our business serving fussy customers, and cleaning - endless cleaning of equipment, floors, utensils etc. That would suddenly appeal if writing were a tedious task.

It isn't - at the moment! I want to write and write and keep writing. I want to feel the keys of this keyboard every day, under my fingertips tapping gently away, making words come alive with meaning and context, idea and news. I want to write here in this blog, on my favourite forums, to friends in emails; I want to write stories and poetry, and maybe even drama. I just feel compelled at this time to write it all down.

I'm in story mode at the moment. I have the urge to go into the hills alone, with just this computer and Broadband Internet (for research purposes only of course ;)); a case of bottled water and maybe some cheese and get stuck into the work of writing stories.

Well that's just stupid Michelle! You just said work wasn't what you wanted to do!

Ah! But this isn't 'Work' work, this is 'Play' work! An entirely different animal altogether! :) This is what makes time morph at super light speed or stop still entirely - or both at once sometimes. This is what makes me forget to eat and yet not feel hungry. This is what makes me feel totally real and yet "off with the fairies". This is work that takes me outside of myself while I live inside my head! It's passion, energy, pleasure, and invention with minimal effort. I am LOVING it! :)

It may not last though. I can never tell when my passion for these things will dissipate. I am if anything, somewhat fickle in my interests at any given time. Tomorrow I may lose interest entirely with this writing thing; it will lose it's allure and become mere work again - with no life or energy of it's own. Just another tedious thing I "have" to do! I never like "having" to do anything I didn't want to!

Is this a whinge? Probably! I'm good at those too :)

But while this wonderful creative beast is inside me, I will obey it's command and write until I can no longer do so. I just hope the "Next Big Thing" in my life will be as sweet as this has become today. :)

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