Thursday, July 19, 2007

death is for the living

Mama passed away today 19th July 2007 at 4:20pm Eastern Standard Time.

I was not there to see her final breath.

I saw her lying in her death though; her face shrunk around the bones of her cheeks forehead and chin. Death is unbecoming to those who die in their old age. It isn't a pretty thing.

It is those we love and who remain alive after us; It is for them that death holds its greatest gift. In death we move on ....somewhere. (Perhaps.... who knows really in the end what the truth of that really is. As for me, my faith says it knows where she is :) And it is Good.). But in life, its those who are left to move on into the future - without the one who has died - that grow. In or out growth? It doesn't matter, it is still growth.

Marion Ruby Pitman left a massive legacy of love, humour and service to her fellow kind. She will be fondly remembered by many for years to come as a gracious and kind lady who gave of her time and resources in caring for others.

That is her gift to us. Memories of the things she did and shared amongst us; the changes she wrought in each of us through the impact of her life. Her death focuses our attention on these gifts and rewards us with a sweet and gentle imposition of her heart and soul, her spirit and her faith and how they've impacted on our own lives over the years. No one can underestimate the impact of a life on the future.

Therein lies the secret to immortality. When we live our lives in humility and grace, when we share ourselves openly with candour and compassion, when we grasp not for what is seen and held but for what is felt and understood - that is when we are immortalised in the love of those around us. They carry with them, into the future, the memory of our being and we are not easily forgotten when we are loved so well as this.

Death is not a punishment for the dead, but a gift for the living. It breathes new heart and focus into life so we might live it all the more abundantly. We shall miss Mama for sure - especially her cooking :). I for one am glad that I became a member of her family for she has brought me nothing but endless joy and blessed service over the years.

Thankyou God for the life of Marion Pitman.


RubyShooZ said...


I'm new here but I wanted to say that I am very sorry about you losing your mother. That was one of the hardest things I've ever gone through.

Your post is very eloquent and I agree very much with your sentiments about death and dying and how we are immortalized.

Thank you for sharing. Once again, I'm very sorry about your mom.

Michelle said...

Thankyou so much Rubyshooz for your condolences. She was actually my Mother-in-law but even so she was very much my "other mum" in my life.

I hear all the jokes about MIL's being "difficult" and not particularly pleasant people to deal with but in my case my own MIL was one of the most beautiful souls on the planet and I feel very blessed indeed to have been a member of her family.

Thanks again for your lovely comment and for reading.


EM said...

mitchums -

I know you saw this coming but know too how hard it is anyway. I love you dearly and am thinking of you and am so sorry I only just now saw this post. God bless you.

- emmie

Michelle said...

dear emmie


thankyou from the bottom of my heart. I'll pass on your comment to my hubby too as he wil appreciate your thoughts too.

bless you too :)